An Ode to my Mother.
Renuka Rajesh Nanavati
I’ve been thinking of the best way to write an ode to the wonderful woman that was my mother for days now. It’s taken me a whole year and I still haven’t done a very good job - because she was truly one of a kind, and it’s hard to describe her in just words. You had to know her to know.
Every single person who knew her, even briefly - friends, family, her Bhakti group ladies, our maids, staff, neighbours, even the vegetable seller and our tailor - were heartbroken. No one could believe it. How could this happen?
My mother was a strong believer in God’s plan. Maybe it was God’s plan - maybe it was written in her stars.
Everyone loved her. I think I didn’t grasp the extent of how loved she was until now - her family, her friends truly loved her - she was the youngest and she was everyone’s favourite. Favourite cousin, favourite fifi, favourite bhabhi, favourite masi, favourite friend.
She was the kindest, most religious, most simple, most beautiful person you’d ever meet. She was funny - her laughter was contagious and she loved to laugh. She was a strict mom - she made sure I never veered too far off from where I was meant to be. She was always so proud of me and really, she lived for me. Every small success or achievement- she was so proud of every little thing I did. She loved that everyone called her Dhwani’s mummy. Now that the dust has settled, at least relatively, I just feel lucky that I got to be her daughter. Even if it was just for 24 years of my life - I was, and am, blessed.
My mom had great taste. She was always dressed for the occasion. She was absolutely stunning as a young girl. A lot of people tell me now that I look like a younger version of her - which to me is the best compliment I could hope for. She was so talented and creative - she could make something beautiful out of anything. Her favourite pastime was watching YouTube videos of artists and recreating them at home. Her artwork will continue to be the most beautiful decor in my house forever.
My mother was a gentle, beautiful soul. She was so devoted, so giving, and so kind - she was the kind of person who would travel hundreds of kilometres on a Saturday to teach art to tribal girls. She was the kind of person who would befriend the milkman and scold him for bunking college. She was the kind of person who’d speak to even our Tamil maid in Gujarati and somehow the maid would understand. I genuinely got lucky with her.
My mother deserved much much more than what this life gave her, and I’ll always regret that she didn’t get all that she deserved.
Whatever I am today, I owe to my darling mother. You taught me everything I know, but you didn’t teach me how to live without you. All I can hope is for to be the kind of person you would’ve wanted me to be. And that wherever you are, you’re spreading smiles and love and looking over me.
Yaar, I don't know how and why, but I'm the person who can relate with your feelings very well, bcz in 2018 I lost my mother who was dearest to me, at that time I was in 11th. And I remember after her death when I shifted to my hostel for my graduation, I still remember her death anniversary when I was alone in my hostel room,and I started memorising her and things, events related with her...and I wept as much as I could. I still remember, I'd written a blog with tears in my eyes.
ReplyDeleteBut In the last I would say only one thing that, She was my strength, when she was alive, even her death can't be a reason for my weakness, so after that day I never wept for her bcz her presence and absence both are source of strength for me. And I'll make her alive always, by following the path which she paved for me by following the values which she wanted me to follow. I think you'll relate with it. Your mother is your strength, wherever she is, is watching you. So never be weak. Be strong and prove this world that how strong daughter you are...👍